The Aquarius Boss (January 20 to February 17)
The Aquarian boss eagerly adopts futuristic theories and methods as soon as they become available. Impress your Aquarius supervisor by learning as much as you can about emerging technologies, new gadgets, and early trends in your industry. Always appeal to their sense of reason and logic when presenting information, rather than using emotional ploys as the Water Bearer has no patience for the drama that other bosses, such as Cancer, may tolerate.
The Pisces Boss (February 18 to March 19)
The Pisces boss is often removed from office politics and practicalities, but can quickly pick up on employee feelings. The Fish supervisor usually listens with compassion to employee issues and uses intuition to gauge the best course of action. Give your Pisces boss the same listening ear and the opportunity to let out their emotions, as it may be more efficient than being too concerned with work deadlines. Using multimedia in your office presentations can also impress this boss.
The AQUARIUS Boss
"What sort of things do you remember best?"
Alice ventured to ask.
"Oh, things that happened the week after next."
First and foremost, double-check. Are you absolutely certain that your boss's birthday falls in late January or early February? Having an Aquarius boss is as rare as stumbling upon albino pandas. If you happen to have one, consider yourself in possession of a collector's item, a treasure that may appreciate in value with time.
Seriously, the typical Aquarian boss would prefer starvation over the monotonous nine-to-five office routine. Making decisions makes them uncomfortable, giving orders feels unnatural, and the rigid atmosphere of board meetings, let alone the presence of rigid vice presidents, is entirely incompatible with their free-spirited nature. However, this does not imply that Aquarians lack the skills to be effective bosses. Uranus, the ruling planet, is full of surprises, and one of those surprises is the Aquarian boss who, despite lacking the conventional qualifications, turns out to be indispensable.
When an Aquarian, burdened by the aforementioned negative traits, assumes an executive position, they effortlessly conjure new tricks from their bag of surprises. They may exhibit absent-mindedness and forgetfulness, eccentricity and unpredictability, alternating between shyness and boldness. Yet, hidden behind their enigmatic and distant demeanor, lies a mind as sharp as a bear trap, concealed within those peculiar, distant eyes. Furthermore, they possess a highly tuned and perceptive intuition that might lead you to believe they carry a crystal ball in their pocket. Additionally, they possess an uncanny ability to analyze, dissect, and evaluate information with a razor-sharp insight. Moreover, their intuition extends to establishing warm connections with everyone, from the office boy to the company's most prominent customer. All of this is supplemented by their broad and liberal Uranian philosophy, which allows them to peer into the future while others stumble over the minutiae of the present. These are the surprises I was referring to. Despite the average Aquarian's unsuitability for an executive role, they effortlessly adapt to the position, as though it were their destined path, which, in reality, it is not.
There is, however, another side to the coin. Your boss might occasionally address you as "My secretary, Miss... ah... ah... Miss... uh... what was your name again?" It can be maddening when they clandestinely plan complex projects and spring them upon you at the last minute. You've likely experienced the frustration of being assigned an entirely new and unexpected task without any explanation for the change. But let's admit it, beneath it all, they are rather endearing, aren't they? Once you become accustomed to their idiosyncrasies, sudden shifts, and unforeseen surprises, most Aquarians are genuinely lovable. I must also mention their unwavering opinions once they have made up their minds.
If I were you, I wouldn't attempt to borrow money from an Aquarian boss. If they are a typical Aquarian, they disapprove of living beyond one's means. While some Aquarians may live in luxurious comfort, the majority are content with a modest room as long as they can devote twenty hours a day to advocating for improved housing for the less fortunate. They won't impulsively grant raises, but they won't be stingy either. With your Aquarian boss, you will receive what you deserve?no more and no less. They can be incredibly generous when they recognize someone's exceptional performance that surpasses the call of duty. Make no mistake, they expect your absolute best, nothing less. Failing to meet their expectations may lead to being politely and kindly, but firmly, let go. An Aquarian has no tolerance for slackers or those who put in half a day's work for a full day's pay. To them, such behavior is a form of dishonesty, and they despise dishonesty as much as cats loathe water.
Regarding your personal life, the Aquarian boss harbors no desire to pass judgment or offer advice. However, they possess an insatiable curiosity about it, making it challenging to evade their probing Uranian inquisition into your private affairs. Rest assured, you can share anything with them without fear of shock. Nothing surprises them. They are the most astute observers of human nature within the zodiac, and they will never look down upon you (nor will they look up to you). Your vices and virtues merge into an intriguing and colorful tapestry as far as they are concerned. They take it all in stride, and it doesn't alter their opinion of you. The town drunk and the giggling teenager hold the same level of camaraderie and closeness to them as the president of the local university and the state senator. If your Aquarian boss is authentic, you will find no prejudice or discrimination in their demeanor. In essence, you risk being fired should they catch you pilfering stamps or hiding an unfinished report in your desk. However, if they discover that you are a bigamist, your father served two prison terms, your son indulges in marijuana, or your wife practices yoga in the nude on the back porch, they will simply shrug, considering it your life, and perhaps even come to your defense against your critics. An Aquarian boss will not be bothered in the slightest if you hold conservative political views while displaying a picture of Calvin Coolidge alongside their portrait of Franklin Roosevelt. They won't bat an eye if you stumbled into a taxi after the last office party. Just don't cheat them, lie to them, or, heaven forbid, break your word. Promises and ethics fall within their narrow-minded category.
Unlike Aries or Leo bosses, they won't expend energy trying to convince you that voting for a particular candidate, dating a specific individual, or wearing a particular color tie constitutes a mistake. And unlike Cancer, Capricorn, or Libra bosses, they won't employ persuasive strategies to sway your perspective. Live your life as you choose, and they will celebrate your individualism. Conversely, never attempt to impose your personal code upon them. They won't display any anger, and probably won't even feel it. They might smile and nod thoughtfully, their gaze drifting into the distance, but it would be akin to talking to a wall. They will listen to nearly anyone. Listen.
That's all.
Although they formulate their own ethical code and keep their own counsel when it comes to their personal life, business decisions are another matter. If your Aquarian boss is anything like the average Uranian man, they will seek everyone's opinion on proposed strategies and may even delegate the final decision-making to a subordinate. There is a method to this madness, which differs from the indecisiveness of a Libra. Aquarius isn't evading responsibility. They derive enjoyment from sitting back, wearing an "I-told-you-so" expression when the decision you made (contrary to their keen intuition) fails miserably, as a lesson for you to learn. You must be cautious of this. Aquarian bosses usually grant you all the freedom you require, and even more, should you request it. It is fortunate if they explain the reasoning behind their opinion once, as they rarely offer a second explanation. It is up to you to grasp it the first time, or you will receive a series of confusing statements as a reminder to pay attention to their words.
They expect you to possess antennae that can pick up any missed information from the surrounding atmosphere. They are unaware that others lack their Uranian gift of absorbing knowledge from three simultaneous conversations while peeling an orange, dialing a phone number, and sifting through a stack of interoffice memos.
Don't become too entrenched in your ways around an Aquarian executive. You might walk in one morning to find that your office has been relocated to another floor, with no prior notification. Change is constantly in the air around these individuals. You may experience the disconcerting sensation of your boss unexpectedly descending upon you, sporting a warm and friendly grin, and discarding your entire system out the window?the same system the office has adhered to since the Civil War. In its place, they will introduce a new, faster method devoid of unnecessary details. Is it difficult for you to adapt so swiftly? Do you need at least six months to adjust, as the new system currently appears as Greek to you? They can't fathom that. To them, it's all perfectly clear. Don't worry; you'll catch on. They will wait patiently. And patient they are. While the average Uranus-ruled mind may brim with nervous curiosity beneath the surface, Aquarians generally remain composed and exhibit an image of calm, thoughtful deliberation. I must emphasize the word generally. Of course, there was that one time they dashed out of the office to chase after six fire trucks, the turtle race they organized on their carpet using real turtles, or the day they had miniature TV sets delivered to each desk during the World Series. Let's not forget the morning they temporarily assumed control of the switchboard, just to experience it, resulting in crossed wires, disconnected calls, accidentally selling a half-million-dollar deal to a high-ranking representative from a major TV network, and subsequently forgetting the individual's name when they arrived to sign the contract. However, under normal circumstances, they are placid and composed. So what if they are occasionally eccentric? They rearrange the water cooler monthly, making it impossible to find, and enjoy changing your day off without prior notice. What are these minor inconveniences when you work for a boss who is genuinely fascinated by the book you're writing on Kansas City jazz? And how can you stay angry at a boss who doesn't mind if the bookkeeper grows a beard, their secretary wears white fur boots with rhinestone heels, or the new filing clerk parks their bicycle in the reception room?
They may spend a day incessantly talking your ear off, followed by a week of seclusion within their office, disregarding staff, customers, and suppliers, absorbed in solitary contemplation. They are replenishing their soul, and these moments of retreat are necessary. Regardless of how recently you joined the company, they will consider you their friend. They are even good friends with the competition. Despite what is written on your company letterhead, friendship is the Aquarian boss's true business. Recently, someone discussing today's corporate conformity nostalgically remarked, "Give me back the good old-time individualistic executive with gravy stains on their tie, who got things done without calling a committee meeting for every little snag." Undoubtedly, that person was reminiscing about an Aquarian boss they had encountered years ago.
While reflecting on your own Aquarian executive, you remembered all their idiosyncrasies last week when they received the Man of the Year award from the mayor at that grand formal banquet. You had concluded that, despite their unpredictable ways and eccentric habits, they were one of the most distinguished bosses one could have. Then, by chance, you glanced under the table, only to find their feet impatiently tapping the rug, adorned in neatly polished black dress shoes, one wearing a blue sock and the other a yellow sock.
The PISCES Boss
"You are old" said the youth;
"one would hardly suppose
That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you balance an eel on the end of your nose-
What made you so awfully clever?"
In an office conversation about a new executive at the firm, someone asks, "Do you recall the name of the boss who had coffee with us yesterday?" Another person responds, "No, I mean the one who left this morning."
Typically, the number of Piscean bosses in corporate and industrial settings is as scarce as a bathing suit in the North Pole. Most Neptune-ruled individuals prefer to swim solo, unconfined, pursuing careers as writers, salespeople, creative artists, actors, wandering minstrels, or even soldiers-of-fortune.
However, there are a few areas where Pisces bosses can utilize their talents and become indispensable. They excel in radio stations, TV networks, advertising agencies, and public relations firms. Leading these enterprises, they joyfully dispense creative ideas from their overflowing well of imagination. Unlike certain other zodiac signs like Gemini, Sagittarius, and Scorpio, Pisces sees no reason to bluntly state the unadorned truth. They prefer not to tell it as it is. Instead, they choose to express what they believe will have the most positive long-term effect on others or tell them what they want to hear. This is not because they are deceitful. Through bitter experience, they have learned that society does not always welcome raw and unvarnished truths. Furthermore, they believe that the soul requires the embellishment of ritual and beauty, painting over solid facts. The advertising world on Madison Avenue adores them.
Pisces bosses exhibit exceptional directing skills in theater and film and are capable producers (with the assistance of a competent company manager). They can run a dance studio with incredible finesse. As heads of detective agencies or research bureaus, their uncanny psychic abilities enable them to unravel mysteries and rise to the top. Many travel agencies boast Pisces executives who achieve tremendous success. Charitable organizations often have them as their leaders. Numerous fish find happiness conducting orchestras or bands, ensuring smooth rehearsals and producing great music. They thrive as executive managers of country clubs or hotels (provided there is an efficient bookkeeper at hand). They can competently run a progressive publishing company, magazine, or newspaper, sometimes even brilliantly. You will frequently encounter fish at the helm of service-oriented businesses, and they feel right at home as camp directors or in official capacities within churches or synagogues. However, apart from teachers, professors, and a few administrators in medical or law schools, Pisces is not inherently suited for traditional executive roles.
With their sensitive nature, Pisces individuals are born to serve humanity, rather than amass power or construct vast empires. While they can be capable and competent stockbrokers and shrewd traders, they rarely ascend to the position of the head of a brokerage or bond house. The weight of such responsibility is too great for them. However, thanks to their quick and clever minds, coupled with their sometimes uncanny grasp of numbers, they can derive great enjoyment from juggling the fluctuations of stock prices. To them, it's more like a game than actual work.
If your boss was born in March, they may occasionally display a crosspatch temperament when irritated by something. They possess the gift of words, and when they choose to be brusque, their brusqueness possesses a caustic quality that can sting. However, they seldom exhibit aggressive dominance or genuine pettiness. At one moment, they may startle you with their unconventional ideas, only to execute a slippery about-face and appear to be conformists. Eventually, you'll realize that they are neither staunch liberals nor cautious conservatives. They adopt different viewpoints on different occasions to ascertain your own perspective. They can be a touch tricky. When they find your ideas and conversations interesting, your Pisces boss will listen attentively, silently and sincerely. They may even offer you a glass of sherry to create a relaxed atmosphere. If they find your words dull, their mind will wander while you speak. They might daydream about distant people and places, all while wearing a fixed smile on their face. As natural-born actors, they can make you believe they are paying attention. However, after a certain period, they grow tired of their mental wanderings, realize you are still prattling away, and abruptly interrupt you. From that point on, they will dominate the conversation, and you will listen—for hours on end.
They may have traveled extensively, and if not, they will quickly make up for lost time. Similar to Sagittarian and Gemini bosses, Pisces executives tend to keep a fully packed suitcase behind their office couch. If they don't, they should. Why not suggest it to them? They will likely find the idea splendid. Besides, the mere knowledge that their bag is zipped and ready for departure can provide them with a strange sense of comfort on dreary, rainy days or during the depths of a slushy, bitter winter when the monotony feels unbearable. They will experience periods of despondency, and those will be genuine doozies. It's best to keep your distance from them during such times, hum cheerful tunes while you work, and ensure they have their hot toddy, laced with the finest bourbon.
Treat their wives kindly—I mean wife. (It's an easy mistake to make. Alongside Gemini and Sagittarius bosses, Pisces bosses are more likely to undergo multiple marriages than other bosses.) Their spouse is probably a nice, sensible, practical individual. If she were as imaginative and original as her husband, they would both drown in an ocean of misty dreams and fantasies.
The Piscean executive harbors a partiality for creative thinkers within their organization. If you lean more toward caution than imaginative strategies, you may not receive as many glasses of sherry or as many comradely smiles, but you probably won't get fired either. While they may enjoy the company of others more, they still need you. They rely on your practical approach and organizational abilities. The favored highly inventive employee of a Pisces boss is often caught off guard when the company goes through an austerity phase, and the fish gently wields the axe, retaining the steady, reliable, and somewhat staid worker on the payroll. The Pisces boss will bid farewell with sadness, but they possess astute judgment of human nature, including their own. Although they appreciate the presence and progressive contributions of imaginative employees, their own brand of creativity flows more smoothly when supported by the careful planning and office discipline of wise old heads, even if those heads happen to be young and possess blonde or brunette locks. Discretion and conservatism are not their strongest attributes, and they are well aware of their deficiencies. They can always find another daring and enthusiastic dreamer when business picks up, but during a slight dip in profits, they cannot afford to be without workers whose noses are accustomed to grinding against the grindstone. In the meantime, they figure they will handle the daring and enthusiastic department themselves until the situation improves and they can hire more compatible individuals with their heads in the clouds. Naturally, there are exceptions to every rule, but it won't hurt to let your Pisces boss know that you can be both serious and sensational simultaneously.
You may have noticed that they have appointed a Capricorn or Taurus as an intermediary for employees seeking raises. They know better than to allow you to appeal to them personally. The Neptune nature is such that they find it nearly impossible to say no to a fellow human being who genuinely needs or desires something. They have learned early on to insulate themselves as best they can.
Keep in mind that they live in two different worlds. Such a division of nature can create a confused personality, but it can also lead to brilliance. Their thoughts can be as abstract and profound as those of a Piscean Einstein, who once proclaimed, "God doesn't throw dice." Einstein meant that the law of mathematical probability is not necessarily sacrosanct. Similarly, your Pisces boss feels that accepted business procedures are not inviolable. Time often proves their first instincts to be correct, regardless of how visionary they may sound when expressed. They possess a mystical core, a secret belief in the unseen and the supernatural, although they may be somewhat bashful about it. They won't practice Voodoo at their desk or meditate in the lotus position by the water cooler because they fear ridicule should people discover the undercurrent of their psychic vibrations. However, others always find out about it, despite their clever act of playing the role of a tough realist.
Remember the time your heart was shattered by a boyfriend who ran away, taking your engagement ring and all your dreams with him? Your Pisces boss casually invited you to dinner, filled your sorrowful mind with the kindest compliments, whisked you off to the theater, introduced you to the leading actors backstage, and treated everyone to a late supper. With all the food, wine, and sparkling conversation, he succeeded in diverting your attention from your fickle fiancé. Even though sometimes deliberately gruff, so as not to seem too obvious, for weeks afterward, he found little ways to lift your spirits until the ache subsided. You hadn't uttered a word about the breakup to anyone in the office. How did he know you needed help during that dark period? The gypsy who read his fortune by examining the lines on his hand could have told you. She immediately noticed a rare marking in his palm, indicating he is a compassionate genius. Such individuals are quite rare. That's why he is an extraordinary fish.
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