The CAPRICORN Employee
"If everyone minded their own business," said the Duchess, in a hoarse growl, "The world would go round a deal faster than it does."
Observe the workplace carefully, and you'll easily spot the one I'm referring to. Disregard the temptation to peek at the birthdates in your personnel records. The individual I'm describing is not the original, creative type with bushy sideburns and an antler tooth necklace. Nor is it the boastful adventurer who regales others with tales of pub escapades and romantic conquests by candlelight. These individuals don't embody the spirit of Saturn.
Jovial George, the office prankster who keeps the staff in a state of perpetual panic, is certainly not a Capricorn. Likewise, lighthearted Louie, with his silver tongue and bouncing brainstorms, or the newly appointed promotion manager sporting an orange silk ascot, humming "My Father Was the Keeper of the Eddystone Light" during sales meetings, do not fit the Capricorn mold.
Instead, consider the diligent worker with a reserved demeanor, sporting suspenders and a middle-parted hairstyle. You'll find him punctual, arriving a few minutes early and leaving a few minutes late. He carries himself with an air of conservatism, and his socks are always understated. On his desk, you'll spot a picture of his family framed in ostrich leather. The staff addresses him as "Sir," salespeople refer to him as "Mister," and you seek his assistance when trouble arises. Undoubtedly, he is a Capricorn.
Who else could bear the burden of work that would overwhelm most individuals but not a goat? He serves as your reliable safety valve when things become entangled and chaotic, diligently resolving issues without seeking undue recognition. I doubt he ever rushes into your office; rather, he enters calmly, ensuring first that you're not occupied. Both his attire and demeanor exude conservatism, and he's the only one who never forgets his umbrella on rainy days. He won't misplace his briefcase in the subway or forget where he left his lunch. Ah, his lunch. Naturally, what do you think he carries in that brown paper bag? Eating out can be costly, and he detests tipping and facing crowds.
The last time you saw him flash a bright, toothpaste-commercial smile was when your secretary remarked on how the office couldn't function without him. Smiling isn't his default state. Nor is he the frivolous or foolish sort. While he may tell his fair share of jokes in his dry and sardonic manner or discreetly steal glances at an attractive woman, Saturn will never permit him to abandon all restraint. Most of the time, he focuses on his own affairs. The Capricorn is more likely to furrow his brow disapprovingly at the lighthearted revelries of extroverted individuals than join in. However, his own brand of cynical humor can be quite entertaining when he's in the mood.
Undoubtedly, your Capricorn employee possesses unique and valuable qualities. He's the one you unleash on the skeptical Internal Revenue agent, and after the goat finishes with him, skepticism wanes and toughness softens. The agent may even exhibit courtesy and respect. It's not every day that someone manages to intimidate a tax collector successfully. Recall that high-pressure salesman who attempted to sell you a plethora of perfumed typewriter ribbons in rhinestone-studded boxes, claiming they would boost your secretaries' morale. After spending two minutes with your Capricorn man, that poor salesman pressed the down button on the elevator, appearing as though a souffl? had collapsed.
Somehow, you sense that your Capricorn employee is destined for greater heights in life, yet it's perplexing how he conveys this ambition. There's no overt aggression or transparent ambition about him. He's not an ostentatious or cutthroat climber. Let's rephrase that?he's not an ostentatious climber. In his quiet and unobtrusive manner, the goat possesses a cold determination to reach his destination. Those who impede his steady progress or take advantage of him quickly discover that he is not to be underestimated. He accepts his responsibilities without complaint or resentment, but he won't tolerate being pushed too far. Capricorns afflicted by severe planetary influences in their birth charts can exhibit astonishing cruelty and ruthlessness. However, the average goat will simply growl and give a stern look to those who prod his horns.
Allow me to share a tale of a Capricorn I once knew who worked at a donut shop. Perhaps he had a Leo ascendant or his Moon was in Gemini or Aries at birth. This goat wore expensive Italian shoes and flashy cufflinks. He claimed to have more romantic conquests in a week than most men have in a lifetime?or so he said. He enjoyed recounting risqu? stories, and when he wasn't flirting with female customers or impressing others with his toughness, he concocted ambitious and unconventional schemes and promotions. Most people would never identify him as a Capricorn, but a closer look and careful listening would reveal otherwise.
Beneath his audacious flirting, when he spoke to his fianc?e on the phone, his tone was tender and protective. Any man who dared to use profanity in her presence would never attempt it again. He made it clear that she was a lady. In the company of his parents, he displayed subdued respect. Anyone older than fifty received his courtesy bordering on reverence. With children, he was as gentle as Whistler's mother. Powerful and renowned individuals reduced him to a humble, worshipful admirer. He was perpetually recounting tales of sitting next to glamorous movie actresses on planes or attending receptions at the Governor's mansion. Everything he purchased was wholesale, including his Italian shoes. He was undoubtedly the tightest tipper in town. Where a dime could be saved, a dollar would never be spent. In other words, beneath that facade of false bravado was a quintessential Saturn nature. This seemingly aggressive and extroverted goat blushed at compliments and became painfully shy in the presence of those he considered superior. If you require further proof of his Capricorn nature, consider that he eventually acquired a chain of donut shops. By the way, he never risked his own money on those wild promotions?it was always someone else's.
The typical Capricorn employee is conscientious to the point of excess. A mistake or error in judgment weighs heavily on them. Failing in their duties leaves them despondent. If necessary, they will return to the office and work overtime, but they won't be pleased if it means missing dinner at home with their family too frequently. The goat prioritizes their domestic responsibilities and will return to the grindstone later, if required. You won't find them switching jobs frequently. Capricorns determine early on what their goal is and pursue it with unwavering persistence. They are not indecisive or uncertain about their future. The summit of the mountain is never obscured by the fog of whimsical dreams or sentimental wishes. Titles seldom impress them. They are not in search of glory. They seek true positions of power?to be the ones guarding the fort while the individualists and idealists chase butterflies. They don't require their name in gold letters on the door to feel important. However, do ensure that you increase their sphere of responsibility at appropriate intervals and provide sufficient compensation to keep pace with their peers. They must reside in the right neighborhood, send their children to esteemed schools, and dress their wives more tastefully than their acquaintances. This necessitates substantial financial means. The goat will happily chew on tough leather, steel fragments, or old light bulbs in exchange for the dessert of green paper lettuce, sprinkled with the caviar of social distinction. Their banker may be their closest confidant, second only to their immediate family.
Female Capricorn employees follow the same path as their male counterparts up the mountain. Nothing sways them from their determination to attain positions of authority within the company or marry the boss. The specific outcome matters little; what matters is that they emerge victorious. This woman will not adorn herself with excessive false eyelashes or jingling bracelets at work, nor will you catch her daydreaming at her desk. After office hours, she may display a bit more curiosity. Saturn women often live vicariously through the romantic details of others, but they typically refrain from discussing such matters during work hours. This is logical, as the boss may one day become her husband. Moreover, there's another reason?goats possess a profound sense of duty, respect for their superiors, and inner discipline that prevents them from engaging in office shenanigans.
Both male and female Capricorn employees will approach their work with a businesslike demeanor. They disdain those who arrive late or waste time in idle chatter. They have no patience for flawed methods or nonsensical procedures and will rearrange office systems to ensure efficient organization. Not all Capricorns find themselves in banking, teaching, or bookkeeping roles. They also excel in research, dentistry, engineering, architecture, and are skilled in merchandising, manufacturing, and politics. Many goats pursue careers in jewelry, ministry, hotel management, funeral services, art dealing, or anthropology. Regardless of the occupation, they approach it with utmost seriousness.
Let us not forget the creative side of Saturn individuals. Your Capricorn employee may possess a surprising hobby. They might be a weekend artist and quite talented at it. Perhaps they indulge in music on their days off, dabble in sculpture, excel in real estate, have a green thumb for gardening, sing in a choir, or participate in drama classes. Culture is dear to their hearts, as is Mother Earth. Their true loves include family, home, work, money, prestige, books, art, and music?in just about that order. Persuade an Aries, Leo, Gemini, or Sagittarius employee to embark on business travels for your firm. Most Capricorns break out in a nervous rash at the sight of a suitcase. Even if their aversion isn't that extreme, they prefer catching commuter trains to boarding jets. Besides, who would hold things together while they're away? Remember what happened when they took their vacation last summer? Someone in the office went ahead and ordered four dozen perfumed typewriter ribbons in rhinestone-studded boxes.
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Capricorns are ambitious, disciplined, and confident, making them assets in any job setting. While they respect and demonstrate discipline, they may struggle to adapt to change and can be resistant to new ideas, hindering a company's growth.
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